“Self-Control” or “Everybody’s least favorite Gift of the Spirit”

Each week a group of clergy from the Charlotte area gathers for conversation and prayer. We support one another in joys and sorrows, frustrations and celebrations. Each week we take turns drawing a little, wooden ball from a small, black bag. On each ball is written one gift of the Spirit: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, gentleness, or self-control. That gift is given to us to contemplate for the rest of the week, or at least for the rest of our time together. Of course we all joke about wanting the pleasant ones, like joy or love or kindness. But when we’re really honest with ourselves we often recognize the need for the harder ones like self-control and patience. 

This morning there were three of us. The other two chose before I did and both got joy. I hoped for joy too, but got self-control. Ugh. Then I remembered that I had stopped at Panera on my way to Charlotte for not just one, but two pastries and a large coffee. And I remembered that the night before I had stayed up long past my bed time doing nothing in particular. And then I remembered the massive piles of stuff on my desk at work which have poured out onto the floor, the couch and into the closet. 

I think if I took a quick survey, self-control would be everybody's least favorite gifts of the Spirit. But self-control is one of those tenets of the faith we’re supposed to spend time with especially during Lent as we practice the traditional three disciplines of Lent: prayer, fasting and almsgiving. Now, when I’m really honest with myself- and with God - self-control is not something I’m all that good at. I don’t have trouble with the big addictions like drugs or alcohol or sex or gambling and I’m not violent or a criminal. My self-control issues, and I would posit that this is the case for many of us, are less obviously harmful and therefore more difficult to see and admit. 

Self-control is difficult for several reasons; one of the most pressing is that it is simply not cool. At the risk of sounding anti-culture, which I’m not by-the-way, our society is uninterested in self-control. Self-control is bad for business, for one thing. Most marketing is all about encouraging us to impulsively buy stuff that upon more careful reflection, we don’t actually need. 

But blame cannot be placed only on advertising. There is a secular “I’m OK, you’re OK” philosophy pervasive in much of our culture.  (I’m not specifically talking about the 1967 book I’m OK, You’re OK by Thomas Harris.) Please don’t hear me saying we ought to be more judgmental of one another. That is far from what I want. This philosophy, in my opinion, has sprung from a desire to counteract the excessively judgmental theology espoused for so long by much of Christianity. People have a need to be loved and valued for who and what we are, no matter what. Unfortunately, what has happened is that a stark “either-or” dichotomy has evolved. Either I’m being judged as a terrible person by a far-off God who attacks my very being through the church or I’m perfectly fine no matter what I do or to whom. 

What would be more valuable is to develop a centrist understanding of human nature. Something that admits we are not always OK, that our choices and our actions have consequences which sometimes cause pain and even harm to ourselves and others. Not a judgment pronounced from on high, but an honest admission that I am not perfect and that I do not always have the best interest of God’s creation in mind when I make choices. In other words, I do not exercise self-control in all areas of my life and that has consequences for me and for the world in which I live. 

The other side of that, of course, is that God meets us in the midst of our guilt and pronounces forgiveness. Even as we deal with consequences of our lack of self-control, God comes to us where we are with grace and love. There is a reason the self-control is considered a gift of the Spirit, because left to our own devices, we’d never manage it alone. God’s grace comes to us with the gift of self-control. Seeing it as a gift and not a burden frees us to take it on freely. It is not a chore we have to do on our own without help. It is a present from the Holy Spirit. 

Self-control frees us from slavery to our cluttered lives. In the Sunday Adult Discussion Group we’ve been discussing “The Spiritual Practice of Shedding Stuff,” an article by Diana Dworin from the December issue of The Lutheran Magazine .During one of our discussions, Stacey Leiby defined clutter as “anything that gets in the way of what you want or need to be doing at the time.” The article in the magazine says, “In the broadest sense, clutter can be anything that clogs our opportunity to experience life at its fullest.” It seems antithetical to say that self-control would help us experience life to its fullest. Wouldn’t doing whatever I want and acquiring anything I want help me experience a full life? But people of faith know that exercising control over our impulses to do too much and own lots of stuff does not fill the space in our hearts which can only be filled by Christ. 

The same can be said to the clutter in our minds, hearts and spiritual lives. “Clutter includes the non-essential ways we spend our hours and energy on extraneous activities…It also takes on psychological and spiritual forms, from maintaining unhealthy relationships to nursing the wounds of hurts from years past,” writes Dworin. God’s gift of self-control is a gift of clarity in that it allows us to see what it is to which God would have us give our attention. It helps us to spend our time in life-giving activities and in healthy, supportive relationships including with our loving God. 

So, this morning I groaned when I pulled out the “self-control” ball. And probably I will the next time I pull out that particular spiritual gift. But as I reflect, I also give thanks and I ask God, please give us all the self-control we need to have a full life, the kind of abundant life you desire for us, the kind of life you so want us to have that you died and rose, the life breathed into our very nostrils by the Holy Spirit.  

A Season of Growth - Newsletter article, February 2013

One of my favorite movies is the film from 2000, Chocolat. Besides being titled after one of my favorite things (chocolate) and co-staring two of my favorite actors (Jonny Depp and Dame Judy Dench) it is a brilliant movie that deals with questions of faithful living. It is set at the beginning of the season of Lent in a small French village which has long been proud of its moral rigidity. The movie begins with this voice-over, “Once upon a time, there was a quiet little village in the French countryside, whose people believed in Tranquilité - Tranquility. If you lived in this village, you understood what was expected of you. You knew your place in the scheme of things. And if you happened to forget, someone would help remind you. In this village, if you saw something you weren't supposed to see, you learned to look the other way. If perchance your hopes had been disappointed, you learned never to ask for more. So through good times and bad, famine and feast, the villagers held fast to their traditions. Until, one winter day, a sly wind blew in from the North...” That sly north wind brought a chocolatier and her daughter who shake up the village and force the other characters to ask questions about faithfulness and meaning.

The movie takes us from a faith which values black-and-white morality to a faith which values asking important questions, seeking truth and meaning in unexpected places and creating community which values abundant life. In the climactic scene the young priest, whose sermons had until this point been crafted by the local mayor, speaks freely and honestly on Easter morning: “I do not know what the theme of my homily today ought to be. Do I want to talk about the miracle of our Lord's divine transformation? Not really, no. I don't want to talk about His divinity. I'd rather talk about His humanity. I mean, you know, how He lived His life here on earth. His kindness, His tolerance...Listen, here's what I think. I think we can't go 'round measuring our goodness by what we don't do, what we deny ourselves, what we resist, and who we exclude. I think we've got to measure goodness by what we embrace, what we create, and who we include.” True, there is no mention of Jesus and his resurrection, so you’re not likely to hear this particular sermon from my pulpit on Easter morning. But he does speak resurrection truth. When we value death, then we measure ourselves and others based on laws meant to deny and exclude. When we value life, the new life given to us by the resurrected Christ, then we measure ourselves and others based on love, creation and inclusion. 

So here we are at the beginning of Lent which can be a very stark, very rigid time of year. And granted it is a time that the church has set aside for self-examination and repentance. But at our best, that self-examination will open our minds and hearts to the ways in which we do not live the abundant life which Christ desires for us. And perhaps in these next weeks, by the power of the Holy Spirit, we might learn to ask the difficult questions about faithfulness and meaning that lead us into greater relationship with God and with one another and with all creation. 

To that end, the team assembled to plan worship for Lent and Holy Week have chosen a theme for our worship together: Season of Growth. In our meeting in October, we talked about what the season of Lent is and what it could be for us. The group wanted to create space for our community at Peace to spend time in personal and corporate examination, to ask questions of meaning and purpose, faith and values.

Each week, beginning with Ash Wednesday, we will look at a particular topic: Thankfulness, Service, Witness, Rebirth, Justice, and Sacrifice. Our Wednesday and Sunday Bible Study and Worship will concentrate on these themes in our personal walk with Jesus and our life together in the body of Christ.

I pray that this season of Lent may be a time for reflection and rebirth, growth and sharing so that we may emerge with the resurrection of Easter transformed and renewed.

Sermon, February 3, 2013

Rev. Sarah Friesen-Carper

February 3, 2013 Fourth Sunday After Epiphany PLC

Jeremiah 1:4-10 and 1 Corinthians 13:1-13

A few weeks ago we celebrated the Baptism of Our Lord with the story of Jesus’ baptism from the Gospel of Luke. In that sermon I said that baptism is God’s work that it is as martin Luther said, a visible sign of invisible grace. 

Later that week one of our parishioners said she wanted to talk with me about my sermon. I have to admit that I still get a little nervous in my belly when someone says, “Pastor, I want to talk to you about your sermon.” I think back through the sermon trying to figure out if I misspoke or said some kind of heresy and will need to be strung up by my thumbs. 

So this woman came to my office and said, “Pastor, I want to talk to you about your sermon.” 

“Okay,” I said. 

“I think you said in your sermon that baptism is God’s work.”

“Yes, I did.” (Insert a slight questioning tone in my voice.) 

She went on to say, “So he is with God.” 

You see she had lost a child too soon, before he was baptized and her pastor at the time said, “Well…he wasn’t baptized…” He let her believe that the child’s eternal soul was in jeopardy because he had never been baptized. Now, at the risk of insulting one of my colleagues of the cloth,  I say, this guy apparently never read the Bible. Because if he had, he would have read God’s words to Jeremiah, “before I formed you in the womb I knew you,” and he would have known that God’s love is stronger even than the senseless death of a child. 

In Hebrew the word for love is “Hesed." It gets translated “steadfast love," in English which carries the notion of unshakeable loyalty, or as one translator puts it, "the consistent, ever-faithful, relentless, constantly-pursuing, lavish, extravagant, unrestrained, furious love of God." The idea that the God of the Universe is loyal to _me_ and chases after me simply for the love of me just blows me away.[i]

 

Greek has three words for love: philios which is brotherly love, eros which is romantic love, and agape. The one in 1 Corinthians 13 is agape which has to do with the kind of love that God has for us and gives to us and that at our best we have and give to one another. Some of you learned this chapter of 1 Corinthians in the King James Version of the Bible which translated the Greek word for “love” as “charity.” It is maybe not quite as accurate or as expansive as the word love, but it does remind us that despite the common use of this reading at weddings, St. Paul here is not talking about romantic love. He’s talking about the kind of love that is active in our faithfulness, our righteousness – in the way we treat others and God. 

This whole chapter could be read as a definition of love. ⁴Love is patient; love is kind; love is not envious or boastful or arrogant ⁵or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; ⁶it does not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoices in the truth. ⁷It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. This “… is the love that God has had for us since the dawn of creation. It was the love that welled up in God, and caused him to send his only son to live among us. It was that love which bound Jesus to the cross. It was that love which put Jesus in the cold, dark tomb. It was that love which caused the mighty Power of the Resurrection to come and vanquish death and sin forever. It is the kind of love that knits us to God. And, it is the love that is supposed to knit us to each other in the Body of Christ.”[ii] This love is expansive and transforming. 

We have to read it in context of the rest of the book which is to a young Christian community in Corinth. The immediate previous chapter we’ve heard over the last two weeks. It’s the part about the gifts of the Spirit and the body of Christ. All the gifts are special and important and all are necessary in the body of Christ. There are many gifts, wisdom, knowledge, faith, healing, miraculous powers, prophecy, distinguishing between spirits, speaking in tongues, interpretation of tongues, and all are the manifestation of the Spirit for the common good. You see the Corinthians didn’t have a lot of respect for one another. They had drawn up a hierarchy of gifts and judged each other based on what they could do. So, you can speak in tongues, well that’s not as good as teaching. You can teach? Well that’s not as good as healing. You can heal? That’s not as good as having and imparting wisdom. And unfortunately in Corinth it went further than that too. Because we learn in the 2^nd letter to the Corinthians that they were also judging each other based on social class, treating the wealthy better than the poor, even as far as having communion only among the wealthy and not among the poor. 

So Paul sets out in this letter to change this community. He writes about the gifts of the Spirit and then he goes on to say that all the gifts, all the people are vital to the body of Christ. Regardless of what your gift is or your social rank or your race or gender or whatever other classification may be made, you are part of this body and you are important. 

Paul could have finished there. It certainly is a beautiful message. You matter. You are vital. But he had to go on. Chapter 12 ends with, “I will show you a still more excellent way.” He had still more to teach the Corinthian church about life in the body of Christ. Because even if we recognize one another’s gifts and honor them within our community, if we do not have love for one another, if we do not act because of our love of God and for God’s creation, then whatever we do, no matter how good, it is empty. 

Now, most of us love all the time. We love our family, we love our friends, we love our pets. Love doesn’t seem that hard. Except that Paul used this darn “agape” word, this love-like-God’s-love. And he says that when we do not love like God loves then we are noisy, clanging gongs. Our actions - however important and righteous and knowledgeable - they mean nothing. And the reason they mean nothing is because we have not truly been transformed by the love of God. 

Throughout Scripture God’s love is changing people and transforming them. Abraham and Sarah go from being childless nomads to the father and mother of countless generations bringing light to the nations. Moses goes from a murderer to the leader of God’s liberation movement. Jeremiah goes from scared little boy to prophet of the Most High. Mary goes from unwed mother, punishable by death, to mother of God. And Paul knows the transforming love of God better than many. He had persecuted the followers of Christ with vehemence. And now his heart and soul and mind and strength are consumed with the love of God.

Let me tell you about my Grandpa Carper. He has always been a man of strong faith -strong black-and-white faith. There are right things and there are wrong things for him. He was a member of the conservative, evangelical groups The Navigators and the Gideons. As a doctor he dealt with a lot of grey and no win situations but his black-and-white  faith helped him to manage those difficulties. He was well  known for his bedside manner and well respected in the community because of it.

But when his second son came out to him, told him he was gay, well you can imagine that this was not perhaps exactly the kind of plan he had for any of his 5 children.

And then my uncle and his partner decided to have a baby, carried by a surrogate. And they ended up with twin baby girls. And my grandfather quoted Jeremiah 1:5 “before I formed you in the womb I knew you.” He said, if anyone ever questions whether these babies were meant to be, you tell them that. His theology, however strong, could not stand up to the love of God in Christ Jesus and his heart was transformed. 

That’s the kind of love we receive from Christ, love that takes us from a place of clanging to a place of loving, love that transforms us into loving beings, love that converts our good gifts into loving acts and that’s the kind of love that our Christian community, at its best, is all about. In the Gathering Hymn today we sang, “Great God your love has called us here, as we, by love, for love were made.” We are created by God who is love, for love. God’s love transforms us to be love for one another and for the world. Amen.

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[i] This is a quote from my friend Keith Fry’s facebook page. I don’t know how to quote facebook. Certainly someone has thought of this?

[ii] Morely, Rick http://www.rickmorley.com/archives/2284

Sermon, January 27, 2013

January 27, 2013 Third Sunday of Epiphany PLC

Rev. Sarah Friesen-Carper

Luke 4:14-21

In his inaugural address this past week President Obama quoted from the constitution. “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal; that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable rights; that among these are life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.” He used these words to frame the rest of what he said. And the rest of what he said was honest about our reality and hopeful about our future. 

I don’t know if it was intentional or just good public speaking, but he followed the format Jesus models here in chapter 4 of Luke’s Gospel. Jesus begins with a quote from the prophet Isaiah to frame his speech. “The Spirit of the Lord is upon me, because he has anointed me to proclaim good news to the poor. He has sent me to proclaim freedom for the prisoners and recovery of sight for the blind, to set the oppressed free, to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor.” Granted, his speech is a bit shorter than our president’s speech only a few more words: “Today this scripture is fulfilled in your hearing.” But these words also serve to frame both this gospel and more importantly the work of Christ on earth. This is Christ’s inaugural speech. Yes, it has far less pomp and fanfare than the one last Monday, the immediate audience was likely to be quite a bit smaller. But this speech does what inaugural addresses are meant to do, to announce priorities and to give vision. It tells us what Christ’s work on earth is going to be about and therefore what our time on earth ought to be about as well. 

Let’s take a step back and check out what has happened up to this point. Jesus began his public ministry with his baptism. Remember that after he was baptized the heavens opened and the Holy Spirit descended on him like a dove and God said: “You are my Son whom I love; with you I am well pleased.” Then right after that amazing blessing, the Spirit led him out into the wilderness for a 40-day fast and retreat. But remember that those days were marred with temptations like turning a stone into bread and being the most powerful person in the world. 

This scene in his hometown synagogue then is his first public act of ministry according to the Gospel of Luke. Before he calls any disciples or heals any sick people he is filled with the Holy Spirit and goes home to preach. And these inaugural words reveal the essence of Jesus’ life, ministry and purpose in a succinct few lines. He tells his friends and family back home and all of us hearing the words again today who he is, what he will do and for whom he has come.[i]

First, he is anointed by the Spirit of the Lord. Anyone hearing these words will automatically think of the anointing of the kings of the old days of Israel who were anointed with oil to initiate their reign. And they will immediately think “Messiah” because that word actually means “anointed.” And so Jesus reveals that he is the anointed one promised from of old by the prophets to be a new kind of king. 

Second he is here to do the work of bringing good news, proclaiming release, recovery of sight, freeing the oppressed and proclaiming the year of the Lord’s favor. And third, he’s here specifically for the poor, the captives, the blind and the oppressed. And the rest of this gospel is full of Jesus fulfilling his inaugural promises. His second act of public ministry is to free a man bound by an unclean spirit. And don’t forget about his sermon on the plain where he blesses the poor and the hungry and the grieving. 

Now, as Americans we may or may not agree with the vision and priorities laid out by our president and that is our prerogative. But as Christians who dedicate our lives to following Christ, we are beholden to the vision and priorities set out by Christ. When he defines his work on earth, he also defines the work which we are to be about. 

St. Paul reminds us that we are the body of Christ, and each of us has a vital part to play within the body, a gift with which we have been endowed to use for the good of the world. Dietrich Bonhoeffer once said, “Being a Christian is less about cautiously avoiding sin than about courageously and actively doing God’s will.” And this will Is what Jesus outlines here; courageous acts of bringing good news to the poor, releasing the captives, giving sight to the blind, freeing the oppressed and proclaiming God’s love. 

These are acts of justice and mercy. Now “justice” and “mercy” are words we throw around a lot in the church just assuming everyone knows what they mean. So here’s a quick little vocab lesson: Mercy is an act of care from one person to another; Justice is on a larger scale, changing a system of oppression etc. Compassion International is one of my favorite examples to use. Through Compassion Int’l, individuals or families can sponsor one child in need providing money for that child to receive food or health care or schooling, whatever is needed. That is mercy, one person to another. But the organization itself, Compassion Int’l, works for justice on a larger scale, working to end poverty and hunger within entire communities. 

So, I want to invite us to consider making an inaugural address of our on, maybe not on the grand scale of Jesus or the president. It doesn’t need to be a life-long mission statement or even a vision statement for the next four years. But let’s consider taking on one act – one courageous act – of justice or mercy and then inaugurate that act today by sharing it with the person sitting next to you.  For example, I have decided to take on an act of justice and write one letter a month to my governor or president or representative. I’ll write about whatever is on my mind, whatever issue the Holy Spirit inspires me to write about. I’ll write about what I believe is the Biblical witness for that issue. And you can hold me accountable because I’ll post the letters on my blog as well. 

So, think of one act of mercy or justice, an act of proclaiming God’s love  or bringing good news to the poor or releasing those in captivity or whatever you feel called to do. And then tell your neighbor. Then you will be accountability partners for one another. 

The good news for us is that in his leadership, Jesus gave us the grace both to accomplish our goals and to be forgiven when we falter. Through his life and death and resurrection we have a model of mercy and justice as well as compassion and grace. May we be inspired to act courageously in justice, mercy and love. Amen.

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[i] Lewis, Karoline. http://www.workingpreacher.org/preaching.aspx?lect_date=1/27/2013&tab=3